HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR JULIA!

SURPRISE #1

豆浆油条.

Recently found out that Shang May is my friend's friend's friend, (Singapore is so small) and decided to get in touch with her and ask her how is she going to celebrate Julia's birthday. We started planning two weeks ago.

We thought of buying 豆浆油条 and dropping by Julia's house to sing her (natuerlich) Lin Jun Jie's 豆浆油条 at the same time when Julia opens the door for us.

One interesting point is that someone mistook 豆花 for 豆浆, despite her clearing the doubt with me last week. Hehehehe. So our surprise became 豆花油条, instead of 豆浆油条.

But nevermind, it's the thought that counts. I woke up very early (and I think Shang May, even earlier) and met each other at around 8.35 at Fajar station. I bought the 油条s from the nearby market. We had slight difficulties as to where to buy those 油条s because we do not know exact places near our house that sells 油条s. Fortunately as I was exploring the market, I saw this alluring 油条 stall. Alluring because all the fried stuff looks delicious!

Anyway, we walked to Julia's house and took some pictures before going up. Along the way and in the lift, we tried to sing the song. As I sing, I could feel all my hair standing up. I realise how mushy the song is. But I think it's worth it because she's a dear friend of mine. :)

We were anticipating a big group of people at her house but shocked to see only a few pairs of shoes outside. Her mum greeted us and went in straight to wake her up. (She's still sleeping.) We actually thought of just sitting around until she wakes up but then, forget it.

She whined in her bed and I thought, " That's it man, shall wait for this princess to wake up while me and Shang May entertain ourselves." But after a few minutes, she crawled out of bed and greeted us with a puzzled look.

I thought i was dreaming when what seemed like only an hour later Mum came into the room again and said two of my friends are at the door. I was surprised to say the least, but first reaction was, “Huh, what? Nooo…i want to sleep.” err, and they heard it, i really must apologise to these two mystery friends. I stood up, went out of my room only to see Cindy and Shang May holding Mr Bean plastic bags and fried fritters in front of me. First question was, “为什么你们在一起？” which sounded somehow brokeback but that wasn’t what i meant. geez, i know how they managed to find each other, thru a common friend, but i didn’t think they’d go thru this trouble to come wish me happy birthday! So sweet, as sweet as the beancurd they bought. haa, and their terrible rendition of JJ’s 豆浆油条 was way too charming. hee. My good friends– one from JC, one from Uni…i’d never have survived school life without them. It’s heartwarming looking at them converse so smoothly like they’re old friends. Here’s a very big thank you! I lub you!

Of course you must love us.

It was so mushy that I can't help but keep laughing. Sorry Shang May for not being able to sing the song properly. :P

YEAH! SUCCESSFUL ATTEMPT AT SURPRISING AUNTY LIA!

Julia's friends bought her the...

金三顺 PIG! It reminds me of how San Shi always kick it when he's not happy. (But er-hem, I won't want a soft toy.) So far, My Lovely Sam Soon is my favourite drama so far. Let's see if Goong will take over.

Julia finds the pig dirty.

Us with the pig.

P/S: I took a video of how you whined in bed. Treat me better if you do not want the video to be up on Youtube.

SURPRISE #2

Months ago, I have decided to make a collage for this multi-expression friend of mine after a gathering because I have captured four totally different expressions in just a few minutes.

That's all I prepared. I developed this photo, made use of it as a postcard and wrote my well-wishes at the back of it.

A few days back, this woman told me with much confidence that she's going to receive a collage of her from me on her birthday. As she was trying to be smart, I was making a collage at the same time. So here's the one which I made a few days back.

All filled with our gathering photos. :)

Here's the Cindy version.

Alright, happy now, woman? You can develop this or make it your wallpaper.

SURPRISE #3

In return for your generosity in lending me your piano to play on and your endless encouragement (although I played piano as if I were using my feet), here's happy birthday dedicated to you.

After posting this video up in youtube, some freak commented "is there really a need to look at the scores when you play that?". Julia, you know my standard. To play without major hiccups is the best thing I could do liao.

See how nice I am to you.

Sidenote: I designed a cover for her Brokeback CD. Nice right?

Those who said that it's not nice will be dragged away to have their heads chopped off.

Anyway, do you realise that I keep saying "See you on Saturday"? It's a complete similar scenario with how I keep saying "See you on Friday" to Ying Fong. Wahahahahaa...

Another thing is that I wish to surprise another friend. That's the wish which I listed out as "to be revealed by September" . :) :) :)

Great Lady signing off.

Read about Julia's Week Long Festivity.

Appreciating.

That day when I was at Julia's, I watched Roystan's Tan's Shorts.

I am not one of those very artistic people but I love the way he expressed his feelings via his films. "He must be a very sensitive man," I told Shang May and Julia. Watch his Shorts, a collection of his new short films, if you ever have the chance. :)

Some lines which I find interesting from Monkeylove:

The doctor told me my heart has been stolen.
To be fully cured, I must find the culprit who stole my heart.

There are two things I am really good at
going to the wrong places and falling for the wrong person.
When it comes to catching a thief, this is my first time.

It is by chance that I met you.
I’m going to give chance another chance.
Will you?

Entry inspired by Julia.

***

Got to hear a short clip of Corrine May's Flyaway and find that it has a very heartwarming and calming tune. It is about a mother's love for a daughter, allowing her to go overseas to pursue her dreams.

"When will you be home?" she asks

as we watch the planes take off

We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead

She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled

As a child, she was my world

And now to let me go, I know she bleeds

and yet she says to me

You can fly so high

Keep your gaze upon the sky

I'll be prayin every step along the way

Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart

I love you too much to make you stay

Baby fly away

Autumn leaves fell into spring time and

Silver-painted hair

Daddy called one evening saying

"We need you. Please come back"

When I saw her laying in her bed

Fragile as a child

Pale just like an angel taking flight

I held her as I cried

You can fly so high

Keep your gaze upon the sky

I'll be prayin every step along the way

Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart

I love you too much to make you stay

Baby fly away

ohh...

I love you too much to make you stay

Baby fly away

***

I can sort of understand how mums feel when their children leave them. When I came back from Germany (when I only went away for 3 weeks), I could see a BIG BEAM on my mum's face when I went back home. I can really feel that she missed me and was really glad that I came back. :)

My Muenster Blog is ready for viewing! :D

After months of preparation, posting of pictures, typing the content, recalling the trip, editing the template, I'm FINALLY DONE with my Muenster blog. Yea, Jane, this is the surprise for you and the Muenster gang. The link can be found under "destinations" on the right-hand-side column of my blog. :)

Great Pretty Lady being entertained. Woot.

actually..can send me pics? i'm blogging now. it's done but no pics

wait for me to be in gd mood
make me happy first

yes ur excellency...-juggles and throws fireballs around like a jester-

throw faster!

must build up speed wot

Breakdown.

Suddenly felt like breaking down in the middle of my bus ride. I guess I was too harsh on myself again. I could not help but think that I could have performed better. This usually happens with a negative connotation. I need a good rest.

So, what's the link between 油条and Fajar station?

Answer will be out this Saturday. ;)

Ego greatly boosted.

Someone just said I am a great lady. Or rather, I claim to be one.

CALL ME GREAT LADY FROM NOW ONWARDS!

ALL HAIL THE GREAT LADY, CINDY KOH.

And then, another person said I can be her Chang Er.

I thought to be Chang Er, I must be pretty pretty (and has a rabbit as well?)? Hmm, maybe she's trying to say I am pretty. Okay, suggestion accepted.

ALL HAIL THE GREAT PRETTY LADY, CINDY KOH.

(current mental state: not that stable)

NETS GIFT CARD!

Read this.

Recently, I have friends who recently received Nets Gift Card as their birthday present. The idea is oh so cool! You can buy whatever you want with the amount of money that your friends chipped in for you. For practicality, this is a totally marvelous idea! Woo-hoo!

*clear throat*

Note: Please check out my wishlist on the right hand side column!

Madness.

Seriously, I think females think too much. Or rather, I think too much. It will be nice if I can convert these energy into doing something more constructive.

I shall try to put an end to it. Realise that my nick is always "I will try not to give in to madness" and not "I will not give in to madness". There is a certain probability but no certainty. I hate it. Why am I so lack of confidence? Confidence confidence, where are you?

Feel like smacking the females who think too much. Feel like smacking myself sometimes too. Boo.


A heartfelt quote from My Lovely Sam-soon:
我的心。。。如果可以再硬一点，就没事了吧？~三顺

Family #1

Background information
My brother always leave his organiser opened on his desk. And Xinyi, who always wander in and out of his room, caught a glance of the content.

Xinyi: Eh? Kor Kor 几时有 play tennis?

Mum: 要你管啊?

Xinyi: ... (mumbles about my brother's schedule)

Mum: 这样他今天做什么?

-_-"

Happy Birthday, my Honey Bunny! :)

Me, Zhumei and Yujie went to Gelare in Far East Plaza. I ordered a hot drink and a waffle to share with Zhumei. And to my greatest horror, the stupid cup of drink was so BIG size that I can finish the drink in a big gulp. So bo hua! Felt so cheated.

The waffle with a scoop of blueberry cheesecake icecream on it.Of acceptable standard. I still like Häagen-Dazs more (since 1999).May all your wishes come through true and I hope you like your cake!

CRAP! WERE THE FINE LINES WRINKLES?! Mask time!

I recalled Yingfong claiming that she'll remain forever 19th and she had just celebrated her 3rd 19th birthday. Joan will remain forever 20 (is it?). I shall choose a number for myself soon. 18 sounds too young. Maybe I'll adopt 19 or 20 as my age, forever.

*chants "I still look young" continously*

Found a rather sweet quote from Zhumei's email:
"Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each one with a reason why I love you. I was doing great, but then I ran out of stars."

Oh yeah, we're meeting up again to create our own necklaces! Wee! :D

Violent tendencies coming back. (perhaps they have never left before!)

i will break ur back when i meet u

what?! why!

cos i will return u ur broke back dvd
hahahahahaa

ah bish bish

so u'll go home with broke back.

***

“so yes, Cindy, you can whine to me, but on the condition that i may whine to you too. haha.”

Yee. got condition one... tsk. I break ur back this saturday ah! *karate pose*

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST!

Celine Dion/Peabo Bryson

Tale as old as time
True as it can be
Barely even friends
Than somebody bends
Unexpectedly

Just a little change
Small, to say the least
Both a little scared
Neither one prepared
Beauty and the Beast

Ever just the same
Ever a surprise
Ever as before
Ever just as sure
As the sun will arise

Ever just the same
Ever a surprise
Ever as before
Ever just as sure
As the sun will arise

Tale as old as time
Tune as old as song
Bittersweet and strange
Finding you can change
Learning you were wrong

Certain as the sun
Rising in the east
Tale as old as time
Song as old as rhyme
Beauty and the beast.

Tale as old as time
Song as old as rhyme
Beauty and the beast.

There's even German version! (It doesn't sound as good as the English version of course. There's even Japanese version, French version, Czech version...)

Blogging about this not because of my Beauties and Beasts, but because of itself. A wonderful (no more vocabulary liao) piece of music. One day I am going to play this piece of music myself by the piano. :)

Whiny Me.

i just feel like whining
wah.. today i very whiny

no prob la..whine...

I feel like Sam-soon today. Actually I only whined once to you and millions of time to myself. MSN gives me a very detached feeling but still, thanks Julia.

I was "teacher" to someone today. Hahaha! Thought her how to fold a heart for her boyfriend. After pestering me for a few days, Joan finally satisfied her tastebuds today with the western food in Business.And we played Hockey in the YIH Students Lounge after dinner. I wished I had screamed more. I need an avenue for expressing suppressed feelings.

Thanks for the company, girls!

Am I going to strike off "Be clear of what I want in my life" soon?

Scared but have to stay calm.

Confused but have to stay clear-headed.

Stumbled but have to reflect, learn from it and move on.

Imperfect but I have to accept that I am not a perfect being.

Physically, emotionally, and psychologically challenged but I believe this should be what I want for myself.

Back in SCS again...

Yeah, finally took a picture with my supervisor. There's one last person left in SCS whom I want to take a photo with. Hee.

Can you tear a piece of A4 size paper such that it can pass through your whole body? Try it! :)

During Maths tuition, I noticed the kids getting really sian and restless of doing the worksheet, so I suggested (all of a sudden) playing a game. I prepared some little pieces of paper with words of the topic which I am covering recently- Angle properties of Triangles and Quadrilaterals.

And they are supposed to act, say or draw whatever they can to allow their tuition mates to guess the words. Energy level increased as the game reached its hike. I am really glad that they enjoyed the game. Yippie!

Horse leg came out!

u finished the pics wksheet le mah..?

ya..
but i think all wrong..

i got a bit mixed uo
up*
by the descriptions
haiyo!

haa..
ya la..
stupid..

nono i not saying u
or are u scolding me stupid?!
*sob*

no la..
i'm scolding myself..
*sobz*

diaoz
gah nvm
compare ans in class
hahaha

haa.. ya la..
i'm waiting for ans..
ooops..

or-hor!
horse leg come out!

haa..
nice or not?
pretty?

not nice
fat fat one
ahahaa

where got fat fat one?
though got kar mo..
but nice wat..

kar mo!
*runs away*

Irritation.

It's amazing how some people can make you feel so irritated. So irritated that you don't feel like looking at them, don't feel like talking to them, don't feel like meeting them anymore.

Sometimes, I blame myself for being so unforgiving at times. But then again, those continuous disgusting acts reminded me of how traumatised I used to be and being unforgiving is the only way of protecting myself. It's my defense mechanism.

I appear mean or fierce or unapproachable. That's a defensive mechanism. So that people will not talk nonsense to me when I don't know them that well. So that people will not do some nonsensical stuff in front of me. I have a bad temper and I cannot stand nonsense.

And when I don't like a person, it's obvious too. I reduce (as much as possible) my contact with that person. I don't talk to that person unless necessary. I refuse to look at that person.

It's funny why some people don't get my body language right. Am I that ambiguous?

I thought my 人物 is always 鲜明?

Something has become a victim today. I don't know what happened exactly but I just don't feel like doing it. Just that thought of it makes me feel like puking. Really. Why did things turn out this way huh? Keine Ahnung. Gaenzlich keine Ahnung.

Siao Cha Bors.

Sometimes I do use this term on my friends jokingly but then recently, I've been using them to describe some (really) siao cha bors whom I've encountered personally. Really buay tahan these kind of siao cha bors.

In a project group (all girls) of mine, I met this girl who keep swooning at different guys. Her favorable guys ranges from just any Tom, Dick or Harry to an NUS lecturer. Oh my god. Oh well, I do swoon at impressive guys but not to the extent of swooning at them during inppropriate times like, for example, during project discussions. I know my priorities.

It's pretty sickening when you're not so closed to her, thus unable to speak your mind or jolt her head hard enough to bring her back to dicussion proper. Siao Cha Bor. What's so great about these guys.

Next kind of Siao Cha Bors I've encountered in these few weeks- girls who don't go home by 12am. I am indeed very lao kuan (old-fashion) and believes that girls (no matter how old you are) should get home by, say 12am?

It depends on the situation of course. If your dear friends are celebrating your birthday for you, I think it's okay to go home after 12am as long as you've made a call home. But if you're hanging outside after 12am doing some nonsensical stuff like playing ping pong or mahjong when you are still a student- with loads of work to be done and responsibilities to be fulfilled, then sorry, I think you're a siao cha bor.

Whatever that can be done in midnight can be done in during daytime. I don't believe in "daytime no time so I play during midnight" crap. You don't know how to organise your life right? I buy you an organiser then. Cute one, from Taiwan.

Yes, Chichang, other than your girlfriend, there are still other Cinderellas out there.

No matter how mad I may seem in real life, I always behave appropriately at appropriate times perhaps because of stringent expectations from my mum. So, I condemn siao cha bors like how she does. Blame the genes. Lalala~

Awww...

I received affirmation from some of my friends recently.

"was really touched reading your card. i know sometimes i'm mean and i can niao you until quite jialat, but after all that niao-ing, i still treasure you a lot as a friend~ hehehe..."

"just wanted to affirm you that i think you can make a good social worker.. being a social worker is not determined by personality traits. it is really about loving the client event if the client is unlovable. and i believe that you are able to do that. i've worked with you for 10 weeks remember? haha. and we all learn along the way.. who is a perfect social worker anyway?"

:)

-typically-capture-the-moment Cindy signing off.

Fatigue?

Gah, I can feel my energy draining away. I have been feeling so tired these days.

I miss wearing heels, I miss wearing skirts, I miss wearing slippers, I miss hopping around, I miss eating ice cream, and I miss drinking cold drinks. All because of a stupid sprain. Wenn ich besser aufgepasst haette, haette ich keine Verstauchung gehabt! Boo.

I had (still having) cravings for half-boiled eggs this morning and realised that my dear faculty's canteen does not sell half-boiled eggs. I shall head down to Engineering Canteen soon!

Did my SSD, read my SW readings, and bought some stuff for myself, which includes this:
To think I thought this was called "Glucose Samy".

Random #7

SSD has started for both me and my dear partner, Serene. Today is the first day of intervention. Hopefully everything runs smooth for the next three weeks! Everybody, wish us good luck! Today we did what we should do! *pats on Serene's and my own back*

I recalled John Ang's Bus Analogy as I was taking buses from one place to another over the weekends. I guess, intervention is a tedious process, just like the drowiness I experience after taking hours of buses.

I ate Roti Prata on my own at Mr Prata's. It was not that nice actually. I guess what brought me back there was the memories.

I am very very very busy these few days. I aim to sleep early- 12.45 latest. Hopefully I can stay with that timing. A lack of sleep means a bad-tempered Cindy. Stay out of my way or I'll bring my 菜刀 to school or anywhere possible to chop you up. Grrr...

I fell asleep for the second time during the video-screening in my GEK lecture. It's funny because usually people sleep during the lecture proper and not during video-screenings.

Recently, I had some girly chats with my dear girls and also a long chat with Rebecca! She will be back in three months! :D Haha, this is my first time missing a friend who went for exchange.

I realise the more I train myself, the thicker my skin will get. I WILL SURVIVE!

I am giving tuition to a PSLE kid and she's a brat. I worked out a solution of a Maths question behind my music scores because I don't have any other paper with me, and she had the guts to ask that paper from me and claim "You got use meh?". *flashes 菜刀 *

And no, I didn't give it to her. I don't give in to brats.

只要笑一笑，没什么事过不了!

Got this line from Smile Pasta. The drama is quite silly actually but as usual, I watch for the sake of providing entertainment for myself. I quite like the line. Although the difficulties and problems we face might be very very difficult to resolve, it's always important to stay positive and work a way out for yourself rather than dwelling about your mistake. Endless dwelling does no help. So, I am adopting it as part of my long long MSN nick now. Gee.

Crap! What's the time now?! Talk about wanting to sleep early...

A Phenomenological Theory: Carl Rogers' Person-Centred Theory of Personality.

"I speak as a person, from a context of personal experience and personal learning."

Oh, I might be falling in love with this theory pretty soon.

This theory speaks of respect of individuality and reminds me of the possibility that different people have different interpretations of a similar thing. I quite like this theory. How about you?

One childhood dream half-fulfilled. :)

My piano teacher, Amelia.

I am not going to worry about score-reading for the next one year at least. I will pursue this half-fulfilled dream one year later. Till then, I shall explore on other dreams. It's such a nice feeling to do something which you long for so much.

Feeling tired.

Sigh, I woke up feeling really sleepy this morning. I went to practise a bit of (my really lousy) piano and then rushed down to SCS for groupwork and then rushed again to my tuition agency.

To be honest, I wasn't in the best of moods after the groupwork session. I hope things will turn out better next week. Thankfully, I have all the support from my colleagues. Love you all! :)

Surely can one! 加油, 加油, 加油!

My darling YING FONG, happy 21st birthday! :D

A few weeks ago, me and Xinli tried coming up with some interesting ideas of how we're going to celebrate YF's birthday. It was originally meant to be a girly gathering but ended up becoming a larger scale surprise birthday party with her other friends. Having friends knowing your friends helps a lot when you want to organise a surprise for your dear friend. Xinli spent half an hour drawing the words on the cake. She called all of YF's friends, booked the place and did all the work. Well done, girl! :) Ying Fong, so you know what to do le mah?Anyway, I had a really enjoyable time with my darling 6 Beauties, a Beast, and also some new friends (who're YF's friends). It is pretty interesting because I have actually seen a lot of her friends before via Xinli's or her blog. It seems as though I know them but in actual fact, I don't!

At the very beginning, there's only me and Chichang entertaining ourselves. Chichang rushed over to meet me in NUS because he was busy wrapping his present. Haa, Ying Fong, touched or not? As time passes by, people slowly flowed in.

But somebody else is a BIGGER shot than the rest. She came at 8++pm when we're supposed to meet at 7pm and all of us were flattened with hunger. When I asked Xinli to bring Ying Fong to walk around the garden (逛花园), I thought they would arrive soon. But they took a long time to arrive and Ashley thought they might be kidnapped.

The food was of okay standard, but luckily the company was great. It's really amazing how well everyone interacted with each other when we barely know each other.

When big shot finally arrived, we greeted her with a birthday song and got her into total (I think) shock. She has forgotten that she needs to take off her shoes because we're on the second level of Essential Brew. Got to see darling Elayne and Ashley. LOVE AND MISS YOU ALL A LOT!! Too bad Ashley had to leave early. Elayne tried to match-make again after attempting to match-make my son and her daughter (or is it my daughter and her son?) but failed! Does your mole no longer function well?

The match-making session one or two years ago.

Pardon my ugly looks. This proves that I don't dress up in the vicinity of my neighbourhood.

Elayne is also my personal trainer, who helps me to achieve 6-pack. My gym session today was great! Managed to burn some fats! Gee.

Training that took place last December.

Hee, here are my Beauties! Ashley and Elayne.Xinli and me.Us and BIG SHOT. The guys-nice and sociable.
The Beauty and the Beast (with a weak heart).
My beauties again! Can never get sick of them!
But 6 缺 1. :(

I'll organise a KTV gathering soon, okay?

Okay, some interesting tales to share.

I saw Ying Fong last Friday and went home together with her as usual after German lecture. By that time, we already planned the birthday party and I have to purposely say "see you next Friday" in the hope that she will not suspect a thing. *grins*

Guys do the darnest things. I notice this guy who bounced the balloons on his thighs when no one was entertaining him. I shall protect his identity by not saying who he is. :P

I quite like the socialisation tonight. Everyone warmed up and was quickly socialising with each other. I guess it's a similarity in our culture. But I wouldn't confirm that it's a university culture because there are still some people who're not so willing to socialise.

I've met people who are really not sociable (and they are guys). Out of courtesy-tsk-, I asked them what are they doing now and all those normal socialising questions. Whatever I asked, they answer me with one or two words. The most they said was like, one short sentence. Hello, I am just being friendly so can you just reply or say something at least. It's not that I am picking you up but it's basic courtesy to reply or say something in return? I don't know what's wrong with some of the guys today. You think all girls talk to you with ulterior motive meh? What a fat fat hope.

Alright, enough of complaining.

My darling Ying Fong, thanks for always listening to my tales, complaints and for being so receptive to my rubbish. Thanks for the rides home together too. I am really glad to have someone to accompany me almost all the way home, haha. I hope you really like the surprise. Guess what, I almost cried when we sang the birthday song for you as you came upstairs! Gaaaaahhh.

*touched*

Zum Geburtstag VIEL VIEL VIEL Glueck! :D

Assumptions.

Some people simply love to assume things and refuse to use their brains to think through before opening their mouths or before carrying out certain actions. These people really irritate me a lot. And these people include some friends too. Oh well, to err is human eh? My foot. You all have brains to think. Not as if you're brainless. All these could have been avoided.

I've been hearing "Social Work is Sociology" for several bloody times since eons ago. Oh pluuuueeessseee, Social Work is not Sociology, and Sociology is not Social Work either!

Sociology is the study of society and human social action, while Social work is a helping profession focused on "social change, problem solving in human relationships and the empowerment and liberation of people to enhance well-being" (IASSW & IFSW 2001).

Please read up before telling me "Social Work is Sociology". I really hate that line now.

It's similar to saying Mechanical Engineering is Electrical Engineering, or Astrology is Astronomy, or Philosophy is Psychology.

Alright, perhaps it's because we make use of sociological theories and that's why people misinterpret our profession but it's really irritating and insulting to have people misinterpreting what you do and think that they really understand what you actually do for your profession. Oh crap. If you don't know, just ask. You won't lose anything by asking.

Let me repeat, SOCIAL WORK IS NOT SOCIOLOGY!

Another irritating crap that I always get from those ill-informed: Social Work? It's voluntary work, right? Never earn any money one, right?

For your information, Social Work is a profession. Voluntary work is just voluntary work. It requires no professional skills. Talking about professionalism, Social Work is the only department which offers a professional degree in the whole of FASS. Now get that bloody piece of information into your puny little brain. Buay tahan.

Enough said.

Secondly, people love to assume what kind of a person I am and start to make conclusions about me. The most common assumption about me is that I have a bad temper. Oh yes, I admit that I have a bad temper. But what makes me irritated is that people doubt my capability in performing as an individual as a result of my bad temper.

For example, my mum's pretty good at telling me that I am not suitable for teaching because of my bad temper and a serious lack of patience. And so, I changed my dream career path a year ago and I think she's pretty happy that what she said came true I guess. But that's because she does not understand my possible future job scope as a Social Worker.

Next up, several friends said to me (quite long time ago and even now) that I am not going to survive in the Social Work field as I will burn out easily with my bad temper and lousy patience. I tried to argue my stand by saying that I believe in myself that I will be professional and not lose my cool while carrying out my work but sadly, not many people believe me. And then, I doubt myself for quite a while before finalising on my major a few months ago, which was like Year 2, Semester 2?! It was very late for me to decide my major.

But after my attachment, my confidence level grew and I believe I can be professional as long as I choose to be professional. All those "you'll burn out easily", "you got such a bad temper, you sure you want to be a Social Worker??" crap went down the drain. But of course, I felt injustice as I recall how people judge me when they did not even see me serious at work.

And then recently, got assumed that I might be interested in running for leadership elections as a result of my enthusiasm in certain fields. Enthusiasm does not equates to interest in running for those fields' leadership elections.

Using an example to illustrate (wah, very GP), having a liking for peanut butter, doesn't mean that I have to like peanut pancake as well. In fact, I hate peanut pancake. So dry.

I believe I have the capacity to fulfil my own dreams myself. I don't need help if I did not ask for help. I am a very vocal person actually. I'll cry out "I am hungry" when I am hungry, so really, I don't like people to poke into my life. Or rather, you can say I don't like people to make assumptions about me, which is back to the topic of the day.

Actually I do not blame those people. I just hope that they can think before they say or do certain things because what they say or do will actually somehow affect the one involved? I wish that they can observe more and listen more to what other people actually want before making false assumptions? (Afterall, that's why you have two eyes and two ears.) For those who are ill-informed, they should actually read up more or just act dumb?

I am fine- just a little pissed. That's all.

SW3202- Single Subject Design.

I am really excited about the Single Subject Design that I am going to design. It's going to be about something that I want to improve on and I'll blog about it if there's at least some minor successes. If it's not successful, I'll probably cast it behind me and move on with life.

My day started off with me heading to school at 8.30am to print some notes and then studying in Central Library with Ming En till 12pm. I enjoyed the SW3202 tutorial with Dr. Ow. Maybe it's because of the interesting topic covered.

Thereafter, met up with Lay Peng for lunch. She's still as pretty as ever. We talked about everything (Ming En) under the sun and I am really glad that we met up despite having tight schedules.

Back to my SSD, if it's successful, one can definitely sense a Cindy with a much better mood.

*Cross fingers*

Piano lesson. Mini concert. Grace's 21st birthday party.

I went for my usual piano lessons and played a song with the chords (manually). My teacher could see that I was trying really hard and stroked me by saying, "You must have practised very hard." Indeed, I practised like hell for two to three hours straight at Aunty Yalian's house. And it was quite painful for me to stretch my fingers all over the piano because I have to press all the various notes all at the same time. I was reminded of 晴空 who practised too hard to achieve better cutting-hair-skills. Scary.

Anyway, I played Myojo Mee tune and another song as well. It was really fun. I unintentionally saw my teacher's schedule for the day and it looked like I was the only student today. So I was pretty lucky because I got to attend her mini concert. Haha. She played a lot of tunes for me. I was like WOAH.

Have you heard the grand piano before?" I answered no. Immediately, she took me to the room which has all the grand pianos and played some songs for me. For this moment, I felt like Sam-soon, unable to learn piano at young and wanted very much to learn. She is pretty accepting of my point of view on buying a piano and I am really glad for that. :)

My teacher playing 我真的受伤了,

发如雪,

and lastly, 安静.

After hearing these, I felt that the piano pieces are much nicer than Jay Chou's mumblings.

I headed to Aloha Loyang Chalet right after the mini concert for Grace's birthday party. I have gone through a lot before reaching that ulu place. I was limping a little as my legs felt sore. And I was roaming all around Downtown East before actually knowing where exactly to head. I asked for directions three times. I am pretty glad that living in the West justifies my 路痴-ness in the East.

The chalet was beautifully decorated by her boyfriend and her brother's friends. And oh, her boyfriend also got her a beautiful bouquet of flowers.
A lot of people were asking the same stupid question- Who buy one ahh? Other than boyfriends, who would buy flowers? Other friends would probably get something more practical.

Not that a bouquet of flowers is not practical. I didn't say that.

Receiving a bouquet of flowers definitely makes a girl's day. Don't get cheated when girls say stuff like "It's okay. I don't like flowers and flowers die at the end of the day anyway!". The thing is, just buy. Play safe, guys.

A wide array of food was prepared by her parents. As I am not a picky eater, I thought everything was fine while a few other picky eaters were very honest and spoke as if they were great cooks in life.

If not for Grace, I would not have been willing to go to a place when no clear directions are given and when I am going alone.

Grace in a sexy little red dress made by my mum.

Oh well, those guys are so not creative. They arranged the candles in a rectangle (which looked rather awful) while I suggested arranging them into "21" which looked much nicer.

I was really glad when Grace's mum got a gentleman to send me to the MRT station. It was a very long way out and I think I will take a long time to reach the station.

Along the way, we talked about what we are doing now and I was pretty amused at the great differences between us. He was pretty amused with the fact that I am going home to rest at 9pm instead of going clubbing. In short, we were amused with each other, I think.

This set me thinking about loads of stuff on my way home.

This entry sounds a little weird eh? I shall rest early tonight. Sigh.

Tougher and more tiring.

I am speaking up lesser and lesser in class, if the german people ever notice. I am usually very chirpy in german class. Sometimes I find myself lost in class because of a lack of attention or perhaps because of a lack of good listening skills (which I ought to have). I don't know what to attribute this reduction of participation in german class to.

Is it because...
I freak out easily?
there's no more Herr Chan?
there is a significant number of people speaking up (not to mention, speaking up well) in class?
German class is now three hours in one sitting and I cannot tahan it because I have lessons from 8am onwards on even weeks (pui).

or...
I am just not good at it.

I questioned myself the rationale of taking German. It's not helping my falling CAP and I might not use it in the future (Julia, I doubt the possibility of finding a german boyfriend, ah-duh!). Did I take it for the name of passion? Is this passion really that important to me? Is it worth it?

And here I am, doubting myself when I believe in Strengths Perspective. It is sometimes easy to convince other people. Everyone else except yourself.

Thanks for all the concern.

I am thankful that some people actually took the effort to ask me how's my leg.

It's pretty fine now. I can walk properly but I can't hop or jump around yet. (Or you can say that I don't have the guts to jump around yet.) Certain spots of the leg still hurts when I press them. I have a big blue-black on my foot now. My exercise schedule is disrupted and I doubt I will engage in any vigorous activities for the following week.

And I have two ankle guards now- a result of miscommunication. -_-

Kids.

"Working with kids is a wonderful learning experience. It is often exciting. Sometimes tiring. Sometimes frustruating. But oh well, it intrigues me. I enjoy working with them. I believe in them. I find that they are really not as bad as how adults describe them lah. I really see many strengths in them. Maybe cos of our 'conditioning', we tend to find strengths whenever we look. In many places where we look. However we look. Sometimes, when we talk about the kids, I feel as if the sense of conviction in them run through me... I have not met a kid that makes me wanna give up on them.... or makes me think that he/she is hopeless one leh..."

-my dear partner

I can't really verbalise how much I want to reach out to the youths out there yet. But I totally agree with what my dear partner has typed in her blog.

The day before yesterday, I met a student on a bus. I couldn't remember his name but I remembered his friend's name because it's so catchy. Anyway, he smiled at me. The moment he flashed his smile at me, I could feel the positive energy rumbling inside me. When I asked him, "You remember who I am meh?", he replied, "From Youth Clubhouse lor!"

It's amazing how they always manage to make me smile. :)

Julia came to NUS! :)

Sharon put us aeroplane. I wanted to suan her via sms but refrained from doing so because I am a nice person. Wahahahahahaaa. (I can sense that some people are already rolling their eyes! Oh well.)

So, anyway, I was reminded of what Sharon did to me a few months back. I wanted to blog about it but I kept forgetting.

Evidence that she's good at putting aeroplane.

Neh, Sharon, nothing to say liao, right?

I had Milo from Milo van today AGAIN! I am so so so happy!

Hmm, though I ate Japanese food today, I still have a craving for sushi. :S

I attended Self-harm Workshop today too. I think internally I had not registered the idea that we cannot totally solve such problems easily. But today, I think I could better digest that idea.

A girl raised a query of hers in a rather (I thought) critical tone and demanded (sounds like that to me) long term solutions for self-harmers because the facilitator only gave "short-term" solutions. I understood what she meant but I sided with the facilitator because I myself have been stuck in these kind of sticky situations when I thought I was able to provide solutions for all my clients.

Though I have not handled any client myself yet, I believe that the rapport with your client(what the facilitator believed in) and a listening ear (what I believe in) are very important factors for our clients.

Actually I thought the workshop was not very useful for me because it was aimed at the general population of NUS rather than for NUS Social Work students. A pretty large amount of information was already known to me and it was not engaging enough. But I did my feedback honestly.

I admire the facilitator to be so open to criticisms. Anyway, counselling is subjective. Counsellors are not gods. Please don't think that counsellors can solve your problem with a magic wand or something along those lines. I think there are still quite a lot of people who think that counsellors are fairy godmothers.

By the way, the chocolate cookies offered to us during the tea-break were belly nice! I had three! (And Lydia had six? Wahahahahaa~)

Something seems to be wrong somewhere..

Felt a sense of disappointment and neglect from someone.

Felt a little worried for a friend, or rather, friends of mine.

Felt a little uncomfortable after hearing a piece of news.

Saw someone whom I do not want to see ever again today.

Not to mention I lost my paper diary- a precious place where I can confess everything.

Let's pray that these are results of PMS. It's wonderful how we girls can blame things on PMS. Gah!

I LOST MY MEMORIES!!

I lost my paper diary 11! I cannot find it below my desk, on my desk or anywhere! :( :( :(

FRIENDS :)

I decided to create a new slideshow as I was feeling a little bored. :P

It's in chronological order, from secondary school to JC to University. Primary school? Hmm, I did not keep in touch with my primary school friends, which is a pity actually. Oh well.

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It's a very long slideshow, so enjoy! :)

Transactional Analysis.

Recently, I am very amazed with a new Social Work term, "Transactional Analysis". It's called TA in short and I just had a workshop on this today for four hours?!

I interpret it as a tool for us to better understand different individuals and get to know why they think, behave and feel in certain ways.

I was pretty okay with the readings at the beginning.

Alright, Parent, Adult and Child ego-states.

It got pretty complex as the reading introduced the idea that there's a Parent, an Adult and a Child in every Child, and there's a Parent, an Adult and a Child in every Adult and there's a Parent, an Adult and a Child in every Parent.

O.o

German-learning in Semester 5.

I have Frau Niemann as my lecturer again. She was my lecturer for German 3.

Boy was I happy to see sweets in class because I got a little bored of all the school-talk. The cone-like thing in the picture is called a Schultüte. Parents in Germany give their kids this on their first day of school. Erm, how come I don't have? :S

I must make one for myself next semester as it is probably my last semester in NUS. And, bring it to school. Alright, I am kidding.

My German notebook for this semester. Cool right?

I miss Herr Chan!

Second Sinseh Visit.

I cancelled all my activities today. Reading session, piano lesson, doctor's appointment, and Shiya's birthday party. I like to put my activities back to back and therefore, have to cancel all of them together because my foot, or feet definitely cannot make it.

I felt a minor strain in my kneecap as I crawled around in school yesterday and if I don't plant my butt at home today, I'll definitely suffer on Monday.

I was not expecting 针灸 today so I had to act cool when I saw Sinseh Yalian taking out a BIG needle (number 6) from don't-know-where.
The little cubes were supposed to heat up the needles so as to help out with the blood circulation.Okay, shall go read my readings. :)

Reciprocation.

I was thinking through the things that happened to me in the past and recently.

I used to think that whatever I do SHOULD BE reciprocated. I did something for you, and so you have to do something for me in return. You should lor, because you owe me one.

However, all the things that happened to me actually taught me that there is not point waiting for reciprocation to happen because some people simply don't appreciate or don't remember your help at all. I feel unappreciated and unhappy of course.

But then again, that person might have really forgotten what you did. Forgetting does not mean that he or she did not appreciate it. However, I discount such people because I myself could remember who did what to me and I will make sure that I repay the debts (人情债) that I owe them.

I'll try to convince myself that as long as I have done my part, I should be satisfied already. With regards to other people, I should not care that much anymore.

(I typed this entry yesterday but saved it as draft for no apparent reason.)

Continue that passion in you.

"You breathe in chalk dust
You lose your voice
You're so much on your feet
You strain your eyes and your shoulders are sore
You've got parents to meet
You've a head you have to please
Still you dedicate yourself
You teach"

-an excerpt from A Thousand Paces, a song on Parcel of Love.

Teaching used to be my passion. It's not an easy job, I must say. I feel this way especially after my attachment and after personally encountering some teachers. If you're a really passionate teacher out there, please don't ever give up. Similar to Social Work, the fruits won't grow and drop right in front of you immediately. If you have put in your effort, rest assured that you'll see the fruits growing as time passes by. Don't lose faith in yourself and more importantly, in the students.

You can see the seeds in an apple but you can never see the apples in a seed.
-representative of SCS for my SW3216 lecture last semester.

My heartfelt sincere wishes to all the wonderful teachers.
Happy Teachers' Day.