Clueless of their tactlessness.

I hate to say this but...

some guys really lack the very basic social skills.

One tactless sentence is enough to kill my impression of them.

Bread and butter #85 (Si geen na cum First Closure.)

Super happening day.

I was fuming all the way from 3.30pm to 6.30pm. Si geen na. I really felt like I was at wits' end. Tried every possible technique, asked every possible question. And I got NOTHING! Felt like throwing all my papers away... felt like getting violent, something that I'm good at, heh.

Anyway, I must really do something about it. Cannot just keep focusing on one single issue. I will die of heart attack some day. Urgh.

It's hard to switch back to the happy chirpy mode I was in before 3.30pm, but I had to, because it's a special occasion!

Today is THE day.

On one hand I am really happy, but on the other, I am still worried about the possible risks... Of course, it has been a very satisfying journey. :)

A lot of feelings, which cannot be described easily by words. 一言难尽。

Will look forward to 29 January 2010.


:)


P/S: Stayed in office alone at night till about 9.30pm. The heartwarming feeling from the session helped a little in relieving my worries of staying alone, I guess. Yay, achievement, haha.

Meetups with Jessalyn, Joleen and Rachel.

Took half day off. Honestly speaking, I was trying to clear my offs, because they're going to be overdue soon. But the good thing about this is, I can set aside time to meet up my girlfriends.

Met Jessalyn at Cityhall about one or two weeks ago, and we decided to meet up after such a long time- 5 years? I mean, we do see each other in NUS occasionally, but we only went out together once. But I'm really glad I finally caught up with her today. I think she has the same sentiments too.

We were trying to recall all the choir members of our batch and even our choir seniors, because choir with our seniors was a significant chapter of my AJChoir days. Other than that, we gossiped about almost every single person we knew, (hey, at least I admit that I gossiped okay) and tried very very hard to recall someone's name. It's pretty fun to try to match certain words to his face. But we finally remembered his name! :P

Had some deep sharing about super sensitive issues as well.

I have this comfortable feeling whenever I'm with Jessalyn. Moreover, she's so dependable since JC days. I used to depend on her a lot- went choir practice sessions together, stood together during singing, clinged on to her arm during our Prague trip, moaned to each other about certain people, etc. So I really don't mind sharing my stories with her.

Definitely look forward to more meetups. :)

In the evening, I met up with Joleen and Rachel at Tiong Bahru for Sakae Sushi (again, but I don't mind). Our conversation drifted from Social Work all the way to cockroaches when we saw a baby cockroach crawling in a fast food restaurant. Eek.

And Joleen, being Joleen, said something -_-.

Rachel was sharing about her honours year when Joleen suddenly said,

"Honours? No, we don't need honours, because we're very honest."

-_-

Haha, she is forever so cute.

Felt so relaxed to be chatting the day away...

4 months old Piggie.

Playing with a baby allows me a chance to be super lame, hahaha.
Last week, my trick was to snuggle piggie's tummy with my face and make noises, as if I was going to eat him up. This week, my special trick is to play boxing with him. I forgot how it came about... I was just trying to joke around, and made "bish bish" sounds and voila, he started to giggle as if I was one big joker. Hahaha. His giggles were so adorable (and contagious) lah! :D

Gugu loves you!

Sofra with Beauties and a Beast!

It's the monthly affair again! Beauty and the Beasts gathering. This time round, our dear Chichang is the organiser cum venue-decider. He suggested to go Sofra, a turkish restaurant, located at Beach Road, which is just a 3 minute walk from Bugis MRT station. A really nice photo I asked CC to take. :)

Along our way there, we took photos with the DHL balloon. CC must really thank us to be so enthusiastic models leh. And we passed by the Bridal place (or whatever you call that) where we started to browse through the photos taken. I think natural shots are still better than shots which require the couple to pose in certain ways, e.g. kissing in front of a waterfall. I mean, if they were kissing in a spontaneous and passionate manner, then it would be fine with me. But the picture I saw... is just not nice. The couple looked as if they were forced to kiss each other.While we were browsing, CC happily took so many photos, I think it would be wonderful to engage him as my photographer if I ever get married. No matter where you are, must fly back to Singapore to take photos for me okay? Hehe. Oh yes, about the food at Sofra. It was great! I like the chicken and rice thingy (rice was wrapped in chicken), and the kebab (excluding mutton and beef). Another thing that is worth mentioning- our organiser did a recee! Wow.
Xinli petting Ying Fong.
Our very spontaneous organiser who wore his white Chinese-style top immediately after we settled down.
Us girls in Chinese-style clothings. Ying Fong is wearing a Chinese-style tee, Xinli is in a maroon Chinese-style mini skirt, while I'm in my mum-made pink Chinese-style top.
I told you, turkish coffee is sandy! 1... 2... do our hands really get ready for the camera and smile?I like the exquisite interior of the restaurant!Exotic huh, Chinese-style dressed in a turkish restaurant.Look at the cute turkish figurines in front of us!Dessert after dinner- Tom's Palette! (Just a day after Julia mentioned it!)
I tried Granny's favourite and Apple Pie. They allow us to have two flavours in a cup! Ahhh, they're really nice! And the flavours they have are really special- longan and red dates, chrysanthemum (which they no longer offer :S), rosemary, tangerine, salty caramel (?) etc.

On the way home, Chichang told us about the reality behind the fairy tales that we read when we were much younger. Some princess tried to seduce her own father?! They sound so scary, I hope they're not true! :/

P/S: Elayne had something on, while Alvin was busy with work. Hope they can come the next time!

Again.

有些不该感觉的感觉就应该让它随风而去；

有些不确定的感受也应该放开手，视而不问。

反正，会来的终究会到达。


From Xinli.

I ate a lot today.

Ate a normal prata, half of an egg-prata, and half plate of beehoon goreng. The other halves were eaten by Lyn. Felt so satisfied with the food inside me.

But dinner was a disappointment- oily soft shell crab and almost tasteless pasta. :(

I think the milo from Toastbox tasted much better than the pasta. Alamak.

Anyway, we reminded each other of the cartoons we used to love so much- Lamb Chops (!), Anamaniacs, Road-runner. Ahh, my favourite was Anamaniacs. Can't remember what they did exactly, but I remember that I used to laugh crazily when I was watching it! :D

Think I am getting more and more tired of meeting up in the evenings. I mean, physically tired. :(

Bread and butter #84 (Jogging up a hill.)

Today, I forced TW and BT to jog with me, hahaha.

BT led (broom-ed) us to NUS PGP, and we jogged all the way till we reached Kent Ridge Park. It was so super mah lu to be caught jogging in NUS lah. BT just don't get it. Anyway, it felt like a long journey, and by the end of it, I was panting like hell. Could hear TW echoing my panting, hee.

Thereafter, we had a cheap yet sumptuous dinner at Mega Bites in Faculty of Science. Yummy chicken chop with whipped potato, veggies and soup for only $3.50! Definitely a good deal for us. :)

Enjoyed the jog. Helped relieved some inner stress. Look forward to the next exercising session!

P/S: I've been following my new year resolution very well today. But, I was filled with annoyance, unfortunately. Some people might know why. Don't ask me. Instead, think about what you've done. Anyway, don't worry, I'm recovering already. I'm resilient. -think strengths-

Protecting self.

Sometimes, in order to protect myself, it's better to have resentment rather than hope.

STOP! Think. Do.

I think I'm coping well these few days. Must persevere.

-fierce attempt to protect myself against irrational thoughts-

Bread and butter #83 (Updates on my deadlines.)

12.30pm

Session recordings 2007

PES

OM

Step-Up Annual Report and Programme details

Reading Stars Publicity

Year End Report x 2

Year Plan 2008 x 2

Photos

Step-Up Statement

Statement of account (invoice)


Yeah yeah yeah. Go go go, Cindy! :)

***

4.00pm

Session recordings 2007

PES

OM

Step-Up Annual Report and Programme details

Reading Stars Publicity

Year End Report x 2

Year Plan 2008 x 2

Photos

Step-Up Statement

Statement of account (invoice)

Extra: Prepared recipe books for Reading Stars :)

Bread and butter #82 (Late nights.)

Spent two late nights with my SCS folks- chill out session after brainstorming meeting, and GP chalet.

The brainstorming meeting was not too bad. Think we used our brains too hard. It came to a point where almost everyone was brain-dead, and someone contemplated to take out the foldable wooden doors of our poor meeting room for logistical purposes. O.O

Thereafter, we met up with Chris in Vivo and went to chill out at Villa Bali. SM said he felt like we're the police / lawyers in Hong Kong dramas who chill out in pubs after work, hahaha. And indeed, we talked about theories for a while. Covered my face, hahaha.

Thanks to TW for the recommendation! I quite like the ambience. Albeit, it would have been better if we had individual seats, because if I lean forward too much, my butt can't rest properly on the seat. And if I lean backwards, I can't hear what my folks are saying.

Nevertheless, I had crazy fun with the folks, laughing non-stop because someone became high and said all the wrong things.

Amy... Where is Amy?
Amy's in the toilet.

GP Chalet was at Mount Pleasant, a pretty ulu and quiet place. I had fun playing Wii- tennis and the rabbit game. My arms are aching from all the swinging and slamming! Haha, but it's so fun! :D

Gorgeous girls in action.

I must say, the GP volunteers are really dedicated and united. I hope that one fine day, I can create something like this too! On a side note, I am really amazed by Soon Tien's super good memory!

Father and son.

Sleepy horse and playful pig.Jia Rui has become more and more active. When he was drinking his milk, I made some funny faces at him and he smiled! And at times, he'll give certain super cute expressions like raising his eyebrow or winking at us (!)... and when I mirror him, he'll smile at me! And and, a few weeks ago, when I rubbed my face against his little tummy and made growling noises, he giggled! Ahhhh...

Now he loves to put his little hand into his mouth, which is always disapproved by my brother, haha.

He's only about 4 months old, and he's already wearing clothes made for 6 months old babies! Strong and healthy boy, yeah!

Can't wait to play with him again next week. :)

Bread and butter #81 (Condemnation does no help.)

Condemnation does no help.

Deep in my heart, I believe so. That is why, I held on... despite all the difficulties and irritations.

I feel like I can't do much, but I really care.

And I think we need time. Will anyone give us time.

Bread and butter #80 (Closure.)

I know this is rather backdated, but I was looking through the photos and screenshots I took over the last month... and I was reminded of the pleasant feelings I had when I first saw this animation.
This came across as a surprise... She sent me a link one night, and asked me to watch it excitedly... It was a clip with elves dancing... and the elves were me, her and another girl.

It's just simply a fun clip, but I was pretty touched, because this somehow showed that I was on her mind?

Here's wishing you all the best.

Bread and butter #79 (Deadline horrors.)

If you think "graduating" means "no more deadlines". YOU ARE SO WRONG!

***

Session recordings 2007

PES

OM

Step-Up Annual Report and Programme details

Reading Stars Publicity

Year End Report x 2

Year Plan 2008 x 2

Photos

Step-Up Statement

Statement of account (invoice)

***

Overwhelming. Horrified. Traumatised.

I must 干掉 them as soon as possible! -determined-

Dehydration.

Been dehydrating a lot.

It's not as if I can control the events which happened or are going to happen.

Just feel that... if things were to remain the same, I will feel much better.

*

Please appreciate when I'm showing my happy self.

Who knows when will be the next time I dehydrate again.

*

And one does not need to be happy about certain things only. There can be so many things happening in one's life, so isn't it too simplistic to think that one can only be happy about certain things?

And without certain things, one will not necessarily just wither and die, you know. There are so many precious things in life. Why do some people place so much emphasis on certain things only?

Bread and butter #78 (Good times.)

Come to think of it, I always get to share a lot and hear a lot during car rides.

I like car rides, especially when they are interactive and/or thought-provoking. With the right person, car rides are actually golden opportunities for catching up... feels like quality time spent together. Haa, thank you to those who have cars and always make an effort to send the girls home when it's late at night! :)

Somehow, I feel like there's endless topics to be shared between the folks. I appreciate the times when TW always reframe things in a positive light, SM always give me forgiving and reassuring smiles, BT always watch out for me, PY always so ready to chat, CQ always remind me not to be stressed... I really treasure you ALL loads.


But of course, I understand good things don't last. And that is why, my tears keep rolling down my cheeks.

Bread and butter #77 (Mr Lee's Birthday!)

The calling of an emergency meeting was how we started off with preparing SM for his birthday celebration. (Thanks to PY for adding in frustrated sound effects to emphasize the urgency of the meeting, haha!) Think it's pretty obvious that we're doing something for him, but it's pure fun to pull his leg and insist that he's free during noon. Everyone gathering for the emergency meeting.Trying his very best to search for the 5 items. As you can see, he's super stressed.Cannot find the 5 items? Sabo-time then! Can you feel the sense of urgency in him? Hehehe.
I'm not going to reveal the story behind this photo!!! Happy imagining! HEE...
To protect his precious privacy, I'm not going to put up all the photos that we took today, haha... But he'll have to be good to us to ensure that I will not accidentally upload all his super 没形象 photos! :P

But I must really commend SM for his ON-ness. He's almost always ready to take up sabos! AHHH! I've forgotten to take a picture of SM and his cake with PINK candles! (I specially requested for PINK candles, okay!) Anyway, I made the theme pink, in an attempt to brainwash SM into believing that pink is not equivalent to not-man! And coincidentally, SM turned up in a light pink shirt! :) Gorgeous girls in pink! Thanks for accompanying me and for volunteering to be Alvin and Theodore (I was Simon).
I spent one night coming up with the lyrics woh. You better appreciate it, SM! Hope you feel pampered, honoured and much loved after today's celebration! ;P

Signing off, your dearest and sweetest organiser.

Hana Yori Dango again.

I can never get sick of Hana Yori Dango, can I? ;)

There's no way for me to embed the video when Tsukushi met Doumyoji in New York after not seeing him for a year. So here's part of episode 2 of Hana Yori Dango II, which contains a touching scene with little words but loads of emotions at the later half of the video (15:40). Using only a few sentences, Tsukushi managed to convey her feelings and longing to be together with Doumyoji again. And the scene was made even more outstanding by the beautiful background music. Fabulous.

Some OSTs that I manage to find online! :)




From:

http://ilovemypotatoes.imeem.com/playlist/t3vohYns/hana_yori_dango_ost_music_playlist/

Enjoy! :)

Bread and butter #76 (Folk muses.)

Me: Omg... your computer just switched itself on... O_o

PY: Wow. Tell it that I'm glad it's prepared to work, but I'm not! Hee.

***

SM: Yoz, how you all going IMM? Want me go SCS pick you all? =)

Me: That will be fantastic... marvelous... wonderful... :) Chris said one...

***

Note: While BOTH OF US are in office...

Me: You never reply my sms!!! :(

-handphone vibrated-

"SM: Hey! I'm ok! So what are we having? =)"

-_-

***

Me: I will need to take my leave.

SM: Leave?! Cannot! (He meant annual leave.)

Me: I mean, I'm going home! -_-

***

All: Let's fix a date!

TN: Please don't factor me in.

SM: She doesn't like factorization, 'cos she hates Maths!!

All: . . . . . .

Bread and butter #75 (Domesticated SM.)

SM is so inspired to be a domesticated man, that he decided to make coffee and tea for the girls!
Thoughtful SM making the tea.
Peiyi is so so so happy with the tea!!!

Well done, SM! We lub you deep deep! Hahahahaha... :D

STOP! Think. Do.

It's amazing how the short chat with WP in the morning made me feel better. I didn't exactly told her the whole problem, but I just felt better. I think it's the magic of "opening up".

Somehow, sharing about the problem helped myself to loosen up. It's really a tough time for me... the past few months... facing two major personal and mental crises.

I believe the problems will still haunt me from time to time. But I need to give myself credit, and remind myself to STOP! Think. Do. so as to better organise my life. I have to do it.

Bread and butter #74 (Peiyi.)

This is how cheeky we can be...Thanks to Peiyi's camera in capturing such small little moments. All these pictures are taken within less than a minute? And I thought they all look pretty hilarious and cute. Haaaa! :D

Still Falling- Saybia

Last night I woke
Lost, scared and soaked
In sweat
I lay in bed
Still falling from a rooftop

I’m still trying to get
Closer to who I am
Who I am

Twilight descends
Into a dark velvet painting of my life
Although there’s light
Redemption seems so distant

Enchant me with the courage to believe
Won't you grant me all the wisdom that I need

I’m still trying to get
Closer to who I am
Who am I

Enchant me with the courage to believe
Won't you grant me all the wisdom that I need
Grant me all the wisdom that I need
And enchant me with the courage to be free
To be free

*

This song came from Barfuss OST, which I got conveniently from Jane a few years back. I always thought that this song sounds pretty melancholic, but I didn't have the urge to find the lyrics until just now. Was surprised that the lyrics reflected how I'm feeling now.

Sad to say, I think I'm a little dehydrated over the past few days...

Bread and butter #73 (Guidance Programme Review.)

Thanks to the review, I was reminded of tonnes of other things that I could do with my kids. I am missing out on a lot of things lor. Blur kuku me. :S And there are a lot of things that I can improve on! I must buck up liao lah! Cannot just keep staying blur blur. Go go, Cindy Koh!

Anyway, I'm pretty happy with the standardization done. We must keep the professionalism going, so as to dream BIG. Am I correct, my dear senior?

Stayed till 9pm with TW in office. I wanted very much to prepare for the upcoming meetings because I know that I won't have any spare time to prepare tomorrow (that is today, oh well), and I'm not the spontaneous kind of person who can speak very well and remember every important detail of my programme. And, (TW and SM, read this!) I'm a SYSTEMATIC person, okay... Hahahaha...

The fish soup noodles we had reminded me of the promise the three of us made... And on Sunday, SM actually verbalised the promise via MSN! I'm so touched that he remembered! Even though there are / will be some difficulties, I believe we'll fight through the storms together. Love my 默契 team. :)

P/S: I'm looking forward to the reunion dinner this June / July. The batch of GP kids, who were with me through my attachment last year, will be fulfilling their promise to us after the last two years. It's amazing that time passed by so quickly! And I really miss those times with them... holding hands with me, affirming each other, sharing honest feedback with me... They're my first batch of GP kids, and my stay in SCS last year was made much more colourful because of them. Mid-year FASTER COME!

Great things to keep me occupied on a quiet Sunday. :)

What Your Soul Really Looks Like

You are quite expressive and thoughtful. You see the world in a way that others are blind to. You are a very grounded, responsible, and realistic person. People may not want to hear the truth from you, but they're going to get it. You believe that people see you as larger than life and important. While this is true, they also think you're a bit full of yourself. Your near future is in a very different place (both physically and mentally) from where you are right now. For you, love is all about caring and comfort. You couldn't fall in love with someone you didn't trust.

Inside the Room of Your Soul

I think I will definitely be in a different place mentally in my near future, but I wish to stay physically. Hmm.

Bread and butter #72 (Things to be happy about.)

The rules are easy, just post 10 things that recently made you happy! Then tag 10 people and force them to post this meme on their LJs. Because it is good. Everyone needs a little happiness once in a while.

1) relaxing and interesting Christmas Party in office

2) rainbow picture drawn by BT

3) completed all my session recordings in 2007 by 2007

4) RS volunteers saying, "if you need help, just tell us."

5) playing racing and boxing (XBox) with CQ

6) CM gave me a bottle of bird's nest for covering her duty, and asked me if I had enough rest.

7) LC and TW offering their help to clear the hub so that I can go clear my messy table during spring cleaning.

8) SM offering me tidbits while we were slogging away for PES on a rainy Saturday afternoon. Aww, so sweet!

9) Folks teasing each other with Tongkat Ali and Tongkat Fatimah, muahahahaa~

10) BT, BY and CQ rescuing me during the stormy December Children Holiday Programme

It was quite tough for me to dig out things to be happy about, as December was a stormy period for me... a lot of things happened, a lot of self-reflection, a lot of tears, a lot of struggles. I'm looking forward to Tuesday. -prays-

*

Found out from PY that SM was in office on a SUNDAY!!! So started chatting randomly, and he suggested eating supper together. Thanks a lot for initiating, SM!

Had a great chat with my mo qi team. Must really thank them for listening patiently to my messy thoughts. I will try to remember my strengths. GG2 must also remember okay!

Bread and butter #71 (Overdose of OT.)

Just had a meeting this morning. Thereafter, I was playing around with the computer, doing some little little things, and trying to come up with a neat schedule for the upcoming programme until about 3 plus when SM came back to office and reminded me of PES submission.

我的妈！O.O

I totally conveniently forgot about it! I was too busy and distracted!

And so I spent the next few hours in office, sending emails, collating feedback and attendance, and doing some simple calculations. Couldn't finish it still, because I have some queries. PY help me!

I can finally sleep in next Saturday!!! FINALLY!!!!!!

Bread and butter #70 (My saving angel.)

I thought he's replying a bit slower than usual until this popped out...So, he was trying to draw this for me.

Thank you...

丢脸死了...

Said something too quickly AGAIN! Oh my god.

The only positive thing about this incident is that, it's not as serious as the silly comment I made last year in front of a group of people. Oh my god, so 丢脸...

-covers face and runs away-

Mittagessen mit Jane.

The restaurant that Jane and me wanted very much to try out WAS NOT OPEN! To think we went there specially! So disappointing. But anyway, we managed to find a substitute at Liang Seah street again. Think I'd been there several times last year.

Had a yummy (but messy) steak and Ah Chew Desserts thereafter. We proceeded to shop around, trying to shake off some of the calories we've gained over the heavy meal. I spotted a really sweet yellow dress, but the material was too thin for my liking. And interestingly, both of us spotted a similar dress and purse which we were seriously considering to buy, haha.

Naa, must curb those urges! ;P

2008!

Happy New Year, everyone.

As usual, I wish for beauty, health and most importantly, happiness.

Nothing beats being happy everyday.

Thanks to the people who always stand by me, nurture me, and shower me with concern and love. Love you all to bits. :)

Bread and butter #69 (My Social Work journey as the header!)

I'm very proud to announce that I've finally stepped into the Social Work field for half a year!!! Appraisal will come very very soon (probably in mid-January), and confirmation will follow! :D

To celebrate this special moment, I've featured photos taken throughout my journey in my blog header- photos taken in 2006 during my attachment on the left, and photos taken during 2007 on the right.

Whether you have seen them before in my blog or not, these people have a special part to play in my journey, because they're the ones who are right beside me when I fight through storms. I don't think I'd have the courage to enter the field if not for their support.

Grateful to have them, and I love them loads. :)