Reciprocation.

I was thinking through the things that happened to me in the past and recently.

I used to think that whatever I do SHOULD BE reciprocated. I did something for you, and so you have to do something for me in return. You should lor, because you owe me one.

However, all the things that happened to me actually taught me that there is not point waiting for reciprocation to happen because some people simply don't appreciate or don't remember your help at all. I feel unappreciated and unhappy of course.

But then again, that person might have really forgotten what you did. Forgetting does not mean that he or she did not appreciate it. However, I discount such people because I myself could remember who did what to me and I will make sure that I repay the debts (人情债) that I owe them.

I'll try to convince myself that as long as I have done my part, I should be satisfied already. With regards to other people, I should not care that much anymore.

(I typed this entry yesterday but saved it as draft for no apparent reason.)