PoNdEriNg~

hmm..jus viewed someone's blog jus now and i felt a lil touched abt the ppl's frendship and stuff..hmm..i wonder if my own friendship wif my best frend is that strong.i rem that i dun like going out wif her and her another best frend..i tried to be frendly but when i see myself not fitting into the pic, i start to despair..i dun seem to be her very gd frend..i lose confidence..who is my real best friend whom i can tell everything to? is she still the original 'her'? i really dunno..it's like when we went out tog last time..they were like walking so far up front and i was trying hard to catch up..they were so close..and i seemed so small and tiny..of no importance..i've been thru a tough patch last year w/o her..and when i told her abt it after my As, she's like 'why u din tell me earlier?' well..i guess it's bcos she's very bz? we're all bz basically..and distance has pulled us apart..whh i have to agree..well..i love to share my probs..mayb it's bcos i'm selfish and wanna trouble my frends or i jus wan my views to be heard..anyway, sometimes, my probs seemed very stupid..like crying over studies..i cried like shit..everytime..i hav problems..well..it's so difficult to share cos it seems stupid.well it may seem silly for me to say this but think..it's true lor..and i sometimes feel so lonely..i dunno why too..frends..where are my true frends? are they out there at all?

well..getting a lil emotional here..jus dun put negative comments on dis and make me feel worse, ya?